But now things get real interesting.  Operation Hot Freshmen 55.  “What’re you talking about, Leo?”  I’ll tell you what I’m talking about.  Me and the guys are gonna fill our dorm hall with hot chicks from the incoming class.  Sharkatron3000 is already working his computer hacking magic to make the arrangements!  Me, Fass, and Sharkatron are gonna be surrounded by the hottest frosh babes in the whole school.  We’re gonna get our freaky-freak on!  College is going to be AWESOME!!!!

On a side note, Fass and Sharkatron are gonna be rooming together, which left me high and dry.  Sharsky tried to get me a single, but no dice.  I just hope my roommate isn’t just some kind of total dork.

Last, we just wanted to let everyone know that we gotta suspend operations on the site while we make the move to the east coast.  Next time you see us, we’ll be blogging from college!!!

We’ll see all you dudes again when when get to the right coast!

Fuel the Jet!

The firepower from that tiny “toy” is INCREDIBLE.  Imagine what a giant one could do!  That model plane just ran those French dudes down.  This tank could’ve taken out a whole city block!  That kid and his dad are effing lucky!  For some reason I just keep watching the vid over and over and a chill runs straight down my spine every time!

What do you guys think about this?

Me, i’m fueling the effing jet and packing my things for the east coast!

Once again, vigilant (vigilante?) Agent Elemento P comes through with a very cool link to this article about new technology in robot joints which makes them more compact and useful than ever.

As Farhad Aghili of the Canadian Space Agency explains in the article, “In a nutshell…the control system autonomously realizes the configuration change while demanding minimum actuation effort.”  WHAA?  What kind of an “explanation” is that?  Even a tech-head like me is losing the thread here.  But earlier in the article, we are told the robots have “passive joints that allow the arms to twist and change their length, depending on the task at hand.”  The article continues, pointing out that “This kind of reconfigurable robot could have many uses in space, including performing inspections, assembling devices, and carrying objects. Aghili added that a reconfigurable robot like this one could also have applications in mining, nuclear power plants and the military.”

So it occurs to me that maybe THIS is how some of these mysterious folding robots we’ve been spotting are changing their shapes.  Maybe this is a revolutionary concept to us, but it’s just elementary to them!  But then that leads me to say HOLY TINKERTOYS, does that mean these moveable metallic “visitors” will soon be getting involved in our “mining, nuclear power plants and the military”???  Does that mean these chunks of steel and their little “passive joints” will soon be TAKING OVER our nuclear power plants?

Stay alert, TRED-heads!

Agent Elemento P sent in a link to another alien robot story.  We keep hearing about how humans are sending “rovers” to the planet Mars.  But they keep crashing or getting wiped out somehow.  Only two have made it and are moving across the surface — if we can believe NASA.  And we all know how much we here at TRED trust the government.  The images these robots are supposedly sending back look a LOT like the Nevada desert with a red filter on it.  Come on, NASA, we all know how to do that effect on our laptops!

And those “rovers” look more like tiny and mid-size alien robots to me!  I wonder if these are like those bots we’ve been seeing all over the world hiding (more or less) in plain sight.  Which would mean NASA is on it, too.  Of course!  They’re probably using those things right now to track all of us truth-seekers down!

According to our source, that ATM was robbed less than a minute after this photo was snapped. Which begs the question: What does a bot need with money? Well, one of our commenters theorized that maybe the alien robots have the technology to look like one of us. So if that’s true, then maybe they’d need cash as part of their disguise!

What a frightening thought, people! Now we need to be wary of cars, trucks, toys, and HUMAN BEINGS!

There’s a LOT of material on this flashdrive he snail-mailed me (and by the way, this guy is GOOD — I never even gave him my top-secret address).  It’s all got something to do with a “now defunct” clandestine part of the government, something called Sector 7.  Ever heard of it?  Neither did we.

The first thing Sharkatron and Fassinator were able to de-encrypt was the video you see above- are you serious?? WHAT IS THAT THING!?!

But there’s more…

It’ll take me a while to go through everything, much of it is crazy encrypted and almost un-hackable (almost) but here’s what i’ve been able to put together so far.

1. There’s TONS of documents, videos, and audio clips, which means this division was around a long effing time!

2. These guys were masters of disinformation.  Looks like they were pulling the wool over humanity’s eyes for decades.

3. X apparently used to work for these dudes.  I guess he decided he couldn’t live with the lies anymore so he turned on them.  And they came after him full force.

4. Someone shut down this agency about two years ago — around the time of the Mission City Incident.  Coincidence?  I think not!

5. X has been on the run since then — the government is still out to get him for violating his oath.  Even though he thinks of himself as a patriot, they think he’s a traitor.  He’s barely managed to stay alive.  Right now they’re closing in on him.  He doesn’t know how much longer he can evade them.

6. X made contact with us now because he’s worried that something horrible is about to happen and the people of the world need to know, even though using any form of communication at all puts him in grave danger.

If this brief write-up of what X sent me doesn’t freak you out enough or if you don’t believe any of what X has sent us, there’s more!

I got an e-mail from DevHawk with a link, a vid featuring data from this “Sector 7.”  Looks like he somehow got hold of a bunch of S7 robot sightings around the world with some audio clips of Agent X — who I’m guessing must be our X — talking about stuff that’s referenced in these files. Keep up the good work DevHawk, that’s some hella research.

If this is true, this cover-up goes deeper and wider than we ever thought.

There’s a lot more to this story!  As soon as we get to school and get everything back up and running, we’re gonna blow the lid off this whole conspiracy!

Can barely type — too excited.  Okay, I don’t know about you, but I LOVED IRON MAN (man in robot suit — SWEET!)!  I mean, it couldn’t have been ANY better.  Well, okay, it could have been improved in one way: they could’ve cast Olivia Munn in it.

But I’m now willing to forgive that oversight, because the filmmakers have obviously learned their lesson for the sequel, WHICH WILL FEATURE THE BREATH-TAKING MISS MUNN!  Oh yeah, boyz, you heard me right!!!  Set your clocks for May 2010!!  Only 11 months to go….

OliviaMunn.com confirms the truth!

Looks like those clever Aussies are back in the news, TRED-heads!  Doctor Jiri Janoucek and his team at Australian National University have moved us one step closer to actual teleportation as this article explains.

The team has been working on developing super fast quantum computers, but in the process has “developed a new approach to generating quantum entanglement in beams of light using only two parts.”  Apparently this  is one step on the yellow brick road towards teleportation, though the humble Australian scientist admits, “we have made one of these pieces that is only a tiny bit of the whole idea.”  So modest, Doctor!

But WAIT — maybe those giant alien robots that we’ve seen popping up like mushrooms all over the planet, are already USING teleportation like some kind of bridge through space!  Maybe that explains how we keep spotting NBEs without their starships, eh?  Maybe, just maybe, if there are some FRIENDLY robot ambassadors in the group, maybe they would even SHOW us how they’re doing it.  Imagine the uses!

For starters, this TRED-stud would teleport himself to the LAP of Mistress Munn herself.

Okay, guys, this one has got me climbing the walls with anxiety.  The US Air Force Research Laboratory is developing a rash of new surveillance and attack robots, varying in size from a swallow to a  FLY.  These things sneak, stalk, sense, spy, and SHPLAZAAAM explode on enemy combatants.  Thanks to the ever-vigilant Agent Elemento P for pointing out this article in Esquire (and how dapper of you to be reading Esquire, P), and check out the crazy animated demo vid it links to.

These lil’ BUGGERS, charmingly nicknamed “Suburb Warriors” are a great way to fight terrorists without collateral damage, and hey, what’s better than that.  As Esquire says, “Instead of dropping Hellfires or a 500-pound bomb on an insurgent hideout, one or more Suburb Warriors could fire a volley of mini-missiles at confirmed targets, without vaporizing the wedding reception next door.”  But what’s going to keep me up tonight, and for many nights to follow, is the fear of these palm-sized cuties falling into the wrong hands.  Like maybe hands that can bring them to life and turn them on humanity?  The struggle against terror will look like a beach vollyball game if that happens. Because, as the Esquire article concludes: “You can run from tomorrow’s robotic hitmen, and you can hide, and they’ll flap or squirm or glide into position and kill you anyway.”

Check it.  A dude I met at last year’s Comic Con just sent me this link to a vid he posted today.  He wishes to remain nameless as he’s got a few unpaid tickets for “moving violations” from cops who obviously hate skaters.  Anyway, he just shot this footage yesterday — in fact, he didn’t see the bot in the background when it happened as he was in the middle of falling on his ass.

He only noticed it when he was uploading it. Knowing our mission to bring the world the truth about aliens and robots, he immediately forwarded me the link.  Thanks, dude!  I owe you!

So now we know: the bots operating unopposed on American soil.  Cops, quit ticketing cool skaters and start doing something about the giant alien effing robots strutting around like they own the place — why don’t you ticket THEM?

I can’t BELIEVE none of this has gotten on the news.  I mean, CNN, MSNBC and all those cable news networks spend half their time just showing clips from YouTube and Twitter feeds already.  And yet they seem to care more about Ashton Kutcher’s grocery list than an alien invasion???  Obviously the government’s gotten to them.  We here at TRED, however, are not the bureaucracy’s bitch.

I’m just glad homie didn’t get wasted by that robot.