Posts Tagged ‘ROBOT UPRISING’

Conspiracy, Robotics Gone Wild

Elemento, Dear Watson! We’ve Got the Joint Covered, Now.

reconfigurablerobot

Once again, vigilant (vigilante?) Agent Elemento P comes through with a very cool link to this article about new technology in robot joints which makes them more compact and useful than ever.

As Farhad Aghili of the Canadian Space Agency explains in the article, “In a nutshell…the control system autonomously realizes the configuration change while demanding minimum actuation effort.”  WHAA?  What kind of an “explanation” is that?  Even a tech-head like me is losing the thread here.  But earlier in the article, we are told the robots have “passive joints that allow the arms to twist and change their length, depending on the task at hand.”  The article continues, pointing out that “This kind of reconfigurable robot could have many uses in space, including performing inspections, assembling devices, and carrying objects. Aghili added that a reconfigurable robot like this one could also have applications in mining, nuclear power plants and the military.”

So it occurs to me that maybe THIS is how some of these mysterious folding robots we’ve been spotting are changing their shapes.  Maybe this is a revolutionary concept to us, but it’s just elementary to them!  But then that leads me to say HOLY TINKERTOYS, does that mean these moveable metallic “visitors” will soon be getting involved in our “mining, nuclear power plants and the military”???  Does that mean these chunks of steel and their little “passive joints” will soon be TAKING OVER our nuclear power plants?

Stay alert, TRED-heads!

Aliens, Apocalypse, Conspiracy, Robotics Gone Wild, TRED, UFOS, Video

EXCLUSIVE! Mission City Update!

So excited!! Just got a package from that mysterious Agent X! Wish I knew who this dude was so I could send him a candy-gram.  I love this guy!

There’s a LOT of material on this flashdrive he snail-mailed me (and by the way, this guy is GOOD — I never even gave him my top-secret address).  It’s all got something to do with a “now defunct” clandestine part of the government, something called Sector 7.  Ever heard of it?  Neither did we.

The first thing Sharkatron and Fassinator were able to de-encrypt was the video you see above- are you serious?? WHAT IS THAT THING!?!

But there’s more…

(more…)

Conspiracy, Robotics Gone Wild

Just a Fly on the Wall? Or a LETHAL ROBOT SNIPER?

mav_1mav3

Okay, guys, this one has got me climbing the walls with anxiety.  The US Air Force Research Laboratory is developing a rash of new surveillance and attack robots, varying in size from a swallow to a  FLY.  These things sneak, stalk, sense, spy, and SHPLAZAAAM explode on enemy combatants.  Thanks to the ever-vigilant Agent Elemento P for pointing out this article in Esquire (and how dapper of you to be reading Esquire, P), and check out the crazy animated demo vid it links to.

These lil’ BUGGERS, charmingly nicknamed “Suburb Warriors” are a great way to fight terrorists without collateral damage, and hey, what’s better than that.  As Esquire says, “Instead of dropping Hellfires or a 500-pound bomb on an insurgent hideout, one or more Suburb Warriors could fire a volley of mini-missiles at confirmed targets, without vaporizing the wedding reception next door.”  But what’s going to keep me up tonight, and for many nights to follow, is the fear of these palm-sized cuties falling into the wrong hands.  Like maybe hands that can bring them to life and turn them on humanity?  The struggle against terror will look like a beach vollyball game if that happens. Because, as the Esquire article concludes: “You can run from tomorrow’s robotic hitmen, and you can hide, and they’ll flap or squirm or glide into position and kill you anyway.”

Aliens, Robotics Gone Wild, UFOS, Video

SK8TE and DIE?!

Check it.  A dude I met at last year’s Comic Con just sent me this link to a vid he posted today.  He wishes to remain nameless as he’s got a few unpaid tickets for “moving violations” from cops who obviously hate skaters.  Anyway, he just shot this footage yesterday — in fact, he didn’t see the bot in the background when it happened as he was in the middle of falling on his ass.

He only noticed it when he was uploading it. Knowing our mission to bring the world the truth about aliens and robots, he immediately forwarded me the link.  Thanks, dude!  I owe you!

So now we know: the bots operating unopposed on American soil.  Cops, quit ticketing cool skaters and start doing something about the giant alien effing robots strutting around like they own the place — why don’t you ticket THEM?

I can’t BELIEVE none of this has gotten on the news.  I mean, CNN, MSNBC and all those cable news networks spend half their time just showing clips from YouTube and Twitter feeds already.  And yet they seem to care more about Ashton Kutcher’s grocery list than an alien invasion???  Obviously the government’s gotten to them.  We here at TRED, however, are not the bureaucracy’s bitch.

I’m just glad homie didn’t get wasted by that robot.

Robotics Gone Wild, Video

Big Garbage Brother

Sup, homies!  So, when I saw this story, I got to thinking about the whole Mendelson Robotics mention in the  Department of Defense’s Mission City report (see our Mission to get a  look at the document).  Now hold onto your cahones….

What if the government has alien technology in its possession and it’s  secretly spreading it around the globe through a complex web of subsidiaries?  These “garbage” robots can move around independently right under everyone’s noses reporting on everything they see, monitoring cell phone signals, even divulging the contents of your trash!  (I mean, I got nothing to hide, but I’m just saying.)  Think about it, dudes: Dustbots are the ULTIMATE spies!

Yo, look, maybe I’m wrong, but can you afford to take that chance?  All I’m saying is we need to follow the thread all the way down to the truth.  Did our government make a deal with aliens?  Has some super-secret division of DoD learned how to MASS PRODUCE alien robot technology?  Why start deploying these spy-bots in Italy?  And most important of all, WHAT THE EFF ARE THEY DOING?

Conspiracy, Robotics Gone Wild, Video

Are You Effing Serious? Game OVER MAN — NO MORE QUARTERS!!!

You think this thing will want to be our friend? Cause it scares the eff out of me!